Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Guilty Pleasures

Eveyone has one --That show you love to watch when everyone thinks you're at the gym... the CD you only listen to when no one is home...

Maybe you like to read while using the toilet- Or weep shamelessly at those adopt-an-animal commercials.

One of my guilty pleasures is reading far fetched novels by my favorite author who always places her characters in impossible situations through which they somehow always manage to solve the crime, escape the murders and or fall in love.

I have a 40 minute break between my art history classes (which are in the same room, so i stay in my seat during the gap to ensure visibility of the board once class starts)- where i enjoy reading my books. Unfortunately, after class ends and my reading time begins, i am surrounded by stragglers who feel the need to get validation from the teacher and insist on opening their mouths and sputtering out typically useless sentences which frequently involve the word, "so."

For example, Student: "So, (dramatic pause, Look around to make sure all available yes are on them- continues) i am SO interested in the lifestyle of the Minoans, i think they are SO different and their art is SO... BLAH BLAH... SO... SO..." by now I've stopped eavesdropping (another guilty pleasure). These types tend to talk in circles, waste my life, and RARELY say anything remotely interesting or worth over hearing.

I'm torn.
I don't feel comfortable with my guilty pleasure novels coinciding with my school environment, but i can't listen to those incessant nasally suck ups- and I'm dying to know- Who killed Lindsay and stole Doug's stash? Is Heather walking into a trap, and will she ever tell Cooper how she really feels?

I plan to slowly and quietly pull out my book, never drawing attention to myself, then reading to my hearts content. Unfortunately for me, i don't know if i have ever done anything even remotely quiet and slowly... My book slips through my hands and lands on my desk cover face up.

The suck ups turn their eyes and meet this picture:

I half smile as my cheeks flush with embarrassment (i hope they don't notice) and freeze in fear.
What do i do next?
I've been found out!
These brown nosers (and my teacher) know I don't always read "classics" or memorize my text book in my spare time- like i'm sure they do.

I wait for the snicking, finger pointing and persecution that is sure to ensue.

With my deep insecurities unknown, they turn back to their captivating conversation-not giving me or my book another glance.

Phew, that was a close one.
I finish putting my binder in my backpack. My cheeks hold their pink tint, but i bury my head in my book and quickly forget anyone is even in the room.

Once all human life is gone (aside from me of course) i quietly reflect on what happend and decide i am officially insane to feel ashamed of my recreational reading.

Now read whatever i want... but don't flash the covers around.

So that's it- There is no shame anymore. Don't be afraid to take out that Hanson Album, or watch those reality shows, or do whatever it is you are embarrassed about- chances are, people won't even notice anyways.

Just don't turn the volume up too loud.


Mikey said...

love this post. alot. you are cool. hope that costco candy was delish.

Melanie said...

I love you!! you are so funny!

Maureen said...

You're right...everyone has one.

I used to do the same thing in college (ironic) in between classes while "occasionally" easdropping. It's how I found out that half my nursing class was either engaged or pregnant.

Now I read Harry Potter during my lunch break at work (or I did....)and I would get the occasional snicker. Frankly, I didn't care. I'm so hooked on those books it's rediculous (and totally worth it).

So I say GOOD FOR YOU...doing what you love. Everyone should. :)

strickland party of six said...

Hello, again it's me Harm) That is the funniest thing I have heared but do fear you are right about the GUILTY PLEASURES I had and emberassing moment happen to me in school like that, but that is me and we are talking about you!

Jiles The Great said...

I think you should be able to read whatever you want without fear, kind of like I've stopped caring that people make fun of me at work for ordering Buffy DVDs from Netflix and watching them late at night when the calls slow down. So you go girl or whatever the hip thing is to say nowadays.

kristen said...

That is the kind of thing that would happen to me too... Whenever I try to do something quietly, it always ends up being way louder than if I had not tried at all.

Charlotte said...

I'm totally with you on this. Just do whatever you want and be proud of the fact that you love something lame and/or cheesy. I've gotten over being embarrassed over things that I like...for the most part...:) I like to just live my life and think that the other people around me are insane..cause usually they really are! And how could YOU ever have bad taste in the things that you like?! Not possible. I'd totally back you up on your choices there! :)